Please watch this special...they've just played one of the 911 calls made by the teenage girls who were murdered by their own dad....heartwrenching...I believe the dad is still on the run.

8 pm Saturday july 26  Eastern and Sunday, I'm assuming it's the same times.

This is happening in America, people.

I've Got Your Back

I am a small and precious child, my dads been sent to fight.
The only place I'll see his face, is in my dreams at night.
He will be gone too many days for my young mind to keep track.
I may be sad, but I am proud. My daddy's got your back.

I am a caring mother. My son has gone to war.
My mind is filled with worries that I have never known before.
Everyday I try to keep my thoughts from turning black.
I may be scared, but I am proud. My son has got your back.

I am a strong and loving wife, with a husband soon to go.
There are times I'm terrified in a way most never know.
I bite my lip, and force a smile as I watch my husband pack.
My heart may break, but I am proud. My husbands got your back.

I am a Soldier. Serving Proudly, standing tall.
I fight for freedom, yours and mine by answering this call.
I do my job while knowing, the thanks it sometimes lacks.
Say a prayer that I'll come home. It's me who's got your back.

A Tribute to our Heroes

July 1, 2008 -- Nebraska Beef Ltd. of Omaha, Neb. is recalling about 531,700 pounds of beef used to make ground beef because of E. coli risk.

The recalled beef was included in the Kroger brand ground beef samples collected by Michigan and Ohio health officials from patients who came down with E. coli infection.

E. coli bacteria can cause diarrhea, which may be bloody, as well as stomach cramps and vomiting. Most people recover within five to seven days, but some cases may be severe or life-threatening; infants, elders, and people with weak immune systems are particularly at risk.

Last week, Kroger recalled ground beef in Michigan and parts of Ohio.

The beef recalled by Nebraska Beef Ltd. wasn't sent to retailers. Instead, it was sent for further processing or to wholesalers in May and June.

Consumers with questions about the recall should call James Timmerman, Nebraska Beef's vice president of administration, at 402--733-0456, according to the U.S. Department of Agriculture (USDA).

Bill's camp was destroyed by an electrical fire yesterday. We know that know one was injured, that in itself is a blessing. Please read the following post from the 3/6 Lima Support group.

http://davemultiplied.multiply.com/journal/item/203/36_Lima_Devastated_by_Fire_at_Camp

It seems that half of the platoon lost everything. No injuries, which is a blessing.

I only heard about this yesterday on Rush's show, haven't been watching tv or listening to radio much.  This is a wonderful project and I hope there are a lot of people who will participate.

http://www.moveamericaforward.org/

Move America Forward has launched an effort to ship the largest number of care packages to U.S. troops - in history. Between now and June 26th we're asking Americans to sponsor care packages as part of a mass shipment to our troops - just in time for the 4th of July holiday!

The grand finale to this effort will be a Jerry Lewis style 8-hour Internet Telethon ("From the Frontlines") on June 26th (from 4:00pm - Midnight - Eastern). This cutting edge production “From The Frontlines” will be broadcast live by UStream.tv and hosted by Melanie Morgan & Michelle Malkin. Live and taped reports will be broadcast from our troops serving in Iraq & Afghanistan during the historic 8-hour event. We are also deeply honored that Former First Lady Nancy Reagan has also signed on to support the "Candy Diplomacy" portion of this effort!

Josh McDowell analyzes 3 choices that Jesus gave us to explain His identity. By Josh McDowell

Jesus' distinct claims of being God eliminate the popular ploy of skeptics who regard Him as just a good moral man or a prophet who said a lot of profound things.

 So often that conclusion is passed off as the only one acceptable to scholars or as the obvious result of the intellectual process. The trouble is, many people nod their heads in agreement and never see the fallacy of such reasoning.

 C. S. Lewis, who was a professor at Cambridge University and once an agnostic, understood this issue clearly.

He writes: "I am trying here to prevent anyone saying the really foolish thing that people often say about Him: 'I'm ready to accept Jesus as a great moral teacher, but I don't accept His claim to be God.'

That is the one thing we must not say. A man who was merely a man and said the sort of things Jesus said would not be a great moral teacher.

He would either be a lunatic - on a level with the man who says he is a poached egg - or else he would be the Devil of Hell. You must make your choice.

Either this man was, and is, the son of God: or else a madman or something worse." Then Lewis adds: "You can shut Him up for a fool, you can spit at Him and kill Him as a demon; or you can fall at His feet and call Him Lord and God. But let us not come up with any patronizing nonsense about His being a great human teacher. He has not left that open to us. He did not intend to."

In the words of Kenneth Scott Latourette, historian of Christianity at Yale University:

 "It is not His teachings which make Jesus so remarkable, although these would be enough to give Him distinction. It is a combination of the teachings with the man Himself. The two cannot be separated." Jesus claimed to be God. He didn't leave any other option open. His claim must be either true or false, so it is something that should be given serious consideration.

Jesus' question to His disciples, "But who do you say that I am?" (Matthew 16:15) has several alternatives.

First, suppose that His claim to be God was false. If it was false, then we have only two alternatives. He either knew it was false or He didn't know it was false. We will consider each one separately and examine the evidence.

 Was He a Liar?

If, when Jesus made His claims, He knew that He was not God, then He was lying and deliberately deceiving His followers. But if He was a liar, then He was also a hypocrite because He told others to be honest, whatever the cost, while He himself taught and lived a colossal lie.

 More than that, He was a demon, because He told others to trust Him for their eternal destiny. If He couldn't back up His claims and knew it, then He was unspeakably evil.

Last, He would also be a fool because it was His claims to being God that led to His crucifixion. Many will say that Jesus was a good moral teacher. Let's be realistic. How could He be a great moral teacher and knowingly mislead people at the most important point of His teaching -His own identity?

 You would have to conclude logically that He was a deliberate liar. This view of Jesus, however doesn't coincide with what we know either of Him or the results of His life and teachings. Wherever Jesus has been proclaimed, lives have been changed for the good, nations have changed for the better, thieves are made honest, alcoholics are cured, hateful individuals become channels of love, unjust persons become just.

William Lecky, one of Great Britain's most noted historians and a dedicated opponent of organized Christianity, writes:

 "It was reserved for Christianity to present to the world an ideal character which through all the changes of 18 centuries has inspired the hearts of men with an impassioned love; has shown itself capable of acting on all ages, nations, temperaments and conditions; has been not only the highest pattern of virtue, but the strongest incentive to its practice.... The simple record of these 3 short years of active life has done more to regenerate and soften mankind than all the disquisitions of philosophers and all the exhortations of moralists."

 Historian Philip Schaff says:

"How, in the name of logic, common sense, and experience, could an imposter - that is a deceitful, selfish, depraved man - have invented, and consistently maintained from the beginning to end, the purest and noblest character known in history with the most perfect air of truth and reality?

 How could He have conceived and successfully carried out a plan of unparalleled beneficence, moral magnitude, and sublimity, and sacrificed His own life for it, in the face of the strongest prejudices of His people and age? "

 If Jesus wanted to get people to follow Him and believe in Him as God, why did He go to the Jewish nation? Why go as a Nazarene carpenter to a country so small in size and population and so thoroughly adhering the undivided unity of God? Why didn't He go to Egypt or, even more, to Greece, where they believed in various gods and various manifestations of them?

Someone who lived as Jesus lived, taught as Jesus taught, and died as Jesus died could not have been a liar.

Was He a Lunatic?

 If it is inconceivable for Jesus to be a liar, then couldn't He actually have thought Himself to be God, but been mistaken? After all, it's possible to be both sincere and wrong. But we must remember that for someone to think himself God, especially in a fiercely monotheistic culture, and then to tell others that their eternal destiny depended on believing in him, is no light flight of fantasy but the thoughts of a lunatic in the fullest sense. Was Jesus Christ such a person? Someone who believes he is God sounds like someone today believing himself Napoleon. He would be deluded and self-deceived, and probably he would be locked up so he wouldn't hurt himself or anyone else. Yet in Jesus we don't observe the abnormalities and imbalance that usually go along with being deranged. His poise and composure would certainly be amazing if He were insane.

 Noyes and Kolb, in a medical text, describe the schizophrenic as a person who is more autistic than realistic. The schizophrenic desires to escape from the world of reality.

Let's face it; claiming to be God would certainly be a retreat from reality. In light of the other things we know about Jesus, it's hard to imagine that He was mentally disturbed. Here is a man who spoke some of the most profound sayings ever recorded. His instructions have liberated many individuals from mental bondage.

Clark H. Pinnock asks:

"Was He deluded about His greatness, a paranoid, an unintentional deceiver, a schizophrenic? Again, the skill and depth of His teachings support the case only for His total mental soundness. If only we were as sane as He!" A student at a California university told me that his psychology professor had said in class that "all he has to do is pick up the Bible and read portions of Christ's teaching to many of his patients. That's all the counseling they need."

Psychiatrist J. T. Fisher states:

"If you were to take the sum total of all authoritative articles ever written by the most qualified of psychologists and psychiatrists on the subject of mental hygiene -if you were to combine them and refine them, and cleave out the excess verbiage - if you were to take the whole of the meat and none of the parsley, and if you were to have these unadulterated bits of pure scientific knowledge concisely expressed by the most capable of living poets, you would have an awkward and incomplete summation of the Sermon on the Mount. And it would suffer immeasurably through comparison.

For nearly 2,000 years the Christian world has been holding in its hands the complete answer to its restless and fruitless yearnings. Here ... rests the blueprint for successful human life with optimism, mental health, and contentment."

 C. S. Lewis writes:

"The historical difficulty of giving for the life, sayings and influence of Jesus any explanation that is not harder than the Christian explanation is very great. The discrepancy between the depth and sanity ... of His moral teaching and the rampant megalomania which must lie behind His theological teaching unless He is indeed God has never been satisfactorily explained. Hence the non-Christian hypotheses succeed one another with the restless fertility of bewilderment."

 Philip Schaff reasons:

"Is such an intellect - clear as the sky, bracing as the mountain air, sharp and penetrating as a sword, thoroughly healthy and vigorous, always ready and always self-possessed - liable to a radical and most serious delusion concerning His own character and mission? Preposterous imagination!"

 Was He Lord?

 I cannot personally conclude that Jesus was a liar or a lunatic. The only other alternative is that He was the Christ, the Son of God, as He claimed. When I discuss this with most Jewish people, it's interesting how they respond. They usually tell me that Jesus was a moral, upright, religious leader, a good man, or some kind of prophet. I then share with them the claims Jesus made about Himself and then this material on the trilemma (liar, lunatic, or Lord).

When I ask if they believe Jesus was a liar, there is a sharp "No!"

Then I ask, "Do you believe He was a lunatic?" The reply is, "Of course not."

"Do you believe He is God?" Before I can get a breath in edgewise, there is a resounding, "Absolutely not."

Yet one has only so many choices. The issue with these 3 alternatives is not which is possible, for it is obvious that all 3 are possible. Rather, the question is, "Which is more probable?"

 Who you decide Jesus Christ is must not be an idle intellectual exercise. You cannot put Him on the shelf as a great moral teacher. That is not a valid option.

He is either a liar, a lunatic, or Lord and God.

You must make a choice. "But," as the apostle John wrote, "these have been written that you may believe that Jesus is the Christ, the Son of God; and" - more important - "that believing you might have life in His name" (John 20:31). The evidence is clearly in favor of Jesus as Lord.

Some people, however, reject this clear evidence because of moral implications involved. They don't want to face up to the responsibility or implications of calling Him Lord.

 (I remember taking my teenagers and the youth from the church to listen to Josh McDowell. He was a great speaker, easily understood and there were many youth that asked Jesus into their hearts that night.)

THEN WHAT ARE YOU???  Yes, you could've done worse like you said, you didn' t kill them...No, you killed their childhood, you killed their trust, you killed them on the inside. How would you like to live, incest dad, without ever seeing the sun, without ever feeling a cool breeze in your face, without seeing the flowers bloom in spring.  YOU ARE A MONSTER AND WORSE. I hope you have to spend the rest of your life in a dank, dark, wet cell. I hope you never see the light of day again.

Austrian Father Breaks His Silence, Criticizes Media for Dubbing Him a Monster

By CHRISTEL KUCHARZ

PASSAU, Germany, May 7, 2008 —

Josef Fritzl, the Austrian man who fathered seven children with his daughter while keeping her imprisoned in a windowless dungeon in his cellar, has complained about poor media coverage of the case.

His criticism of the international media's reporting was published in the German tabloid Bild Zeitung.

"I could have killed them all," reads the front page headline of today's Bild Zeitung. And Fritzl, dubbed a monster by the Austrian media, told his lawyer, Rudolf Mayer, "I'm not a monster," according to today's report.

Fritzl is sharing his prison cell with another man who is serving time for taking part in a shooting incident. The men have a TV set and a radio available to them in their cell.

Fritz's lawyer has been seeing him and, according to Bild Zeitung, his client has complained to the lawyer that media coverage has been "unfair" and "completely one-sided."

"I could have killed them all, and no one would ever have known, no one would ever have found out," he reportedly told his lawyer.

Fritzl has confessed to locking up his daughter for almost 24 years, and fathering seven children with her during that time.

Three of those children, Kerstin, 19, Stefan, 18, and Felix, 5, had never seen sunlight until they were released from their captivity by police last month after Kerstin became seriously ill and was taken to hospital for a life-threatening disease. The young woman has since remained in a medically induced coma and is said to be in critical condition.

"If it wasn't for me, Kerstin would not be alive today," Fritzl is quoted by his lawyer as saying. "It was me who made sure she was taken to hospital."

Fritzl was questioned by a state prosecutor for the first time today.

"The hearing, which lasted for about 2 hours, mainly focused on the basic details of Mr. Fritzl and his family's background, as is required by Austrian Law," prosecution spokesman Gerhard Sedlacek told reporters. "Mr. Fritzl has told the prosecutor in charge that he's now willing to cooperate with the prosecution."

Fritzl's lawyer, Mayer, had previously said that his client was "emotionally a broken man, who does not belong in a prison, but rather in a closed psychiatric hospital."

He also claimed that it would be impossible for his client to get a fair trial in front of a jury, given the media coverage and the publicity the case has generated worldwide.

The lawyer, who has received plenty of hate mail since he took the case, told reporters in Vienna that he was trying to get a certificate of insanity for his client, in order to be able to declare him unfit to stand trial.

Meanwhile, the case has reached the Austrian Parliament, where members are debating today on whether to introduce lengthier prison sentences for sex offenders and whether to change the existing laws to allow criminal records to be kept for a longer period. Under current laws, files on sex offenses are removed from the records after 15 years.

The move comes after the revelation that Fritzl had previously served 18 months in jail for a rape conviction but was nevertheless awarded care of three infants thought to have been found on the Fritzls' doorstep.

In fact, these were three of the children born out of his incestuous relationship with his daughter, who were allowed to grow up in the care of their grandparents upstairs while their siblings were suffering in captivity with their mother in the secret dungeon in the basement.

http://abcnews.go.com/International/story?id=4803739&page=1

**I've added this early morning May 5th. We've been up most of the night doing some detective work. Found out these people are fakes, have stolen identities, and more. Read about it here, if you're interested in some of what was found: http://ninjamommy.multiply.com/journal/item/374/BUSTED_ANATOMY_OF_A_LIE?replies_read=3

Ha, ha...BUSTED!! Now soon life on Multiply will get back to normal.**


I may seem to be quieter than usual. Hoping things get back to normal when some high school drama on here is exposed. I will probably be writing a blog about it shortly. We have a group of people (4 people)here on Multiply that are telling a lot of lies about me, my daughter and some more friends, in fact, slandering us, saying we are haters, too many things to list here. I wrote to Multiply and they said to block them, well, blocking them does not stop the slander.The people are plagiarizing blogs and can you believe recipes? lol....As in taking the comment from the recipe and leaving out the woman's name and saying "I" .... I asked the service why is it illegal/wrong to slander in the real world, but okay to do it here. Blocking does not stop lies or the deceit they're spreading. I know Multiply is good at looking at this stuff but they've not answered my second letter.

Two have already left, one is the one who has tried to use oh poor me, since she's been here. Which her oh poor me's are being exposed as I write this... 2 are left. If anyone wants to know their names, pm me.  Who knows if you might be the next victim. These people are pretending to be "Christian" like and quoting scripture and using their Hebrew words.........It's a long story and this may all seem trivial to some but believe me, it has darkened my time here at Multiply.

 I am not enjoying seeing these comments all over Multiply. We have plenty of friends who know what's going on and are backing us on this. If you know Dar...and Ninja Mommy for that matter, they are all about fighting the idealogy of Islam. Dar is really troubled by the plights of the children and women.   (See Dar's blogs if you want see what we have been fighting for a few weeks.) If you know me, I am not a hater, but have been called that. The people do not have any comments that they can show where any of us have promoted hate. It's sickening to know that there are crazy people like this in the world, but it's not surprising that you can find them easily on the internet. Why, because you can be whomever you want to be here. Steal pictures and pretend your a young girl in Yemmenite Jewish wedding garb, steal blogs and say your husband wrote them recently and find it on the internet written in 2000 by a Rabbi. The man is supposed to have converted to Catholicism.

Yet the people that are on their list, follow them blindly. Without knowing us, taking their words that we are haters. This was going to be a short blog. But by golly, I'm tired of the crap and tired of being written about on other comments http://daralharb.multiply.com/journal/item/332/HAHAHAHAHA....TOO_FUNNY._THE_WAR_ROOM_IS_A_HATE_SITE_PART_3?replies_read=25

http://daralharb.multiply.com/journal/item/329/HAHAHAHAHA....TOO_FUNNY._THE_WAR_ROOM_IS_A_HATE_SITE_PART_2?replies_read=29


http://daralharb.multiply.com/journal/item/321/_HAHAHAHAAAAA...TOO_FUNNY.THE_WAR_ROOM_IS_A_HATE_SITE?replies_read=54


I just wish it would stop and they would be exposed for the liars they are.  Sorry, full up to here, and have to rant.

This weeks Sunday School lesson at church was about Receiving Divine Comfort. This made me think about how God comforted me on the day Mama died.

Mama was only 14 when she began smoking. She welded in the California shipyards during the war and smoking seem the thing that most of the young ladies took up to pass time. She often tried to quit but always started up again.

In 1992, I noticed when she walked just a little ways she was completely out of breath and she would hold on to something and lean over as if to muster up more air. This had been going on for awhile. I think Mama was too scared to go to the doctor, she knew what they would say. When we had all begged her to see a doctor, we got the news. The word you just don't want to hear-cancer. It had started in her lungs and spread to her brain where she developed a tumor. After months of chemotherapy, she decided it wasn't worth it, it wasn't going to extend her life any longer. She didn't want to sleep, she wanted to enjoy her last days and be awake to visit. Of course, the pain medicine kept her down most of the time. She wanted to have an early Thanksgiving, because, as she told me, "I probably won't be around for this one." Mom loved to cook, she always did the biggest part of the dinner. Turkey and dressing, carrot cake, banana nut cake, she always tried to fix something for everyone. She wanted to make sure everybody had at least one thing they loved to eat. :) That wouldn't be..... because mom couldn't get around, and the medicine or the tumor had made her like a little child. I remember her taking the handle of a hairbrush and smelling it saying that the perfume smells very good. We laughed and said Mom that's a hairbrush, and wouldn't you know she got a really good laugh out of that too. :) We didn't get to have that early Thanksgiving. Mama died November 5, about 4 months after diagnosing the cancer.

It had spread throughout her body turning her into a person who was dependent on others, whereas she was a very independent person and if she had understood, would have hated having to depend on others. She was always the strong one in the family. Now she was so bad that she had to wear an adult diaper. Thank God, she didn't realize this was happening. We would've had to tie her down otherwise. :)

Before the end, she fell into a coma. I'm not sure how long it was before she passed on, but it wasn't very long. I had taken Kristen to the doctor. I went over to see Mom and told her I loved her and that it was okay if she wanted to go home. We would take care of daddy, we would all be okay. I know my sisters did the same. While we were in the clinic, the receptionist came over to us and had told us that she had passed on.

Driving home was sad, but as I got closer to home, I saw a rainbow. I felt a big smile come over me, a joy that is hard to explain. A joy that only God can give. It was as if mama said, "Hey, I'm home!"

I knew that when she died, she would be without pain once more and in her heavenly home. She and daddy became born again Christians many many years ago. I sit here with a little sadness, but mostly a happiness and joy to know that mom made it home. It's hard on those of us left behind, but putting it into perspective brings about the thoughts of no more pain for our loved ones. Mama would see her mom and dad, and her beloved sister. She'll be waiting there to welcome us. She'll be ready to feed us again. :)

We will all probably face trials, lose a loved one, etc. But God gives us that divine comfort that only He can give. We may have had that trial so that we might help someone else through theirs. God asks us to be an encouragement to someone else. We are expected as Christians, to comfort and strengthen others through their trials. I believe we have these to make us stronger, to give us an idea of how to help that next person who is facing a loved one's terminal illness. I can say it prepared me. I had a friend who found out her mom had cancer soon after mom died and I was able to comfort and help her out throughout the ordeal. I knew what was coming and was able to help her that way.

I pray that if you ever go through a heartache, just look for that rainbow. It will be there.

"Blessed be God, even the Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, the Father of mercies, and the God of all comfort; who comforteth us in all our tribulation, that we may be able to comfort them which are in any trouble, by the comfort wherewith we ourselves are comforted of God" 2 Corinthians 1:3,4

This was posted on Yahoo360 and transferred over here. Mom's birthday is coming up in 2 weeks, April 30 and I wanted to re-post it.

I left my cell phone in the living room, got a call, normal, always happens when I leave it somewhere else. I missed the call. I looked and the number above showed up. So I wanted to know, did I know someone with this number? Nope, don't know anyone in Florida.

I punched the number in Google and lo and behold, there are pages and pages on this number.

One man said this: After doing a little research, they are using what is called "Spoofing". there is actually an online service they can call through that gives them a fake caller ID number that will show up on your phone, so reporting the number shown does no good. Call you local congressman and get them to move on the spoofing services and make them illegal!

Most say they do not have American accents either. Just beware. They try and get credit card numbers so that they can reduce your rate in most cases. I would never give anything out to someone like this. But some will.

Where Is God?

He was just a little boy, on a week's first day.
He was wandering home from Sunday School, and dawdling on the way.
He scuffed his shoes into the grass; he found a caterpillar.
He found a fluffy milkweed pod, and blew out all the "filler".

A bird's nest in a tree overhead, so wisely placed on high,
Was just another wonder that caught his eager eye.
A neighbor watched his zig zag course, and hailed him from the lawn,
Asked him where he'd been that day and what was going on.

"I've been to Bible School," he said and turned a piece of sod.
He picked up a wiggly worm replying, "I've learned a lot of God."
"M'm very fine way," the neighbor said, "for a boy to spend his time."
"If you'll tell me where God is, I'll give you a brand new dime."

Quick as a flash the answer came! Nor were his accents faint.
"I'll give you a dollar, Mister, if you can tell me where God ain't."

-- Unknown

You ask why I follow this Jesus?
Why I love Him the way I do?
When the world's turned away from His teachings
And the people who serve Him are few.

It's not the rewards I'm after
Or gifts that I hope to receive
It's the Presence that calls for commitment
It's the Spirit I trust and believe.

The Lord doesn't shelter His faithful
Or spare them all suffering and pain,
Like everyone else I have burdens,
And walk through my share of rain.

Yet He gives me a plan and a purpose,
And that joy only Christians have known,
I never know what comes tomorrow,
But I do know I'm never alone.

It's the love always there when you need it;
It's the words that redeem and inspire,
It's the longing to ever be with Him
That burns in my heart like a fire.

So you ask why I love my Lord Jesus?
Well, friend, that's so easy to see,
But the one thing that fills me with wonder is
Why Jesus loves someone like me.

I love my master:
Thus I perfume myself with
This long-rotten squirrel.

I lie belly-up
In the sunshine, happier than
You ever will be

Today I sniffed
Many dog butts-I celebrate
By kissing your face.

I sound the alarm!
Paperboy-come to kill us all-
Look! Look! Look! Look! Look!

I sound the alarm!
Neighbor's cat-come to kill us all!
Look! Look! Look! Look! Look!

I lift my leg and
Wiz on each bush. Hello, Spot -
Sniff this and weep

How do I love thee?
The ways are numberless as
My hairs on the rug.

My human is home!
I am so ecstatic I have
Made a puddle

I hate my choke chain -
Look, world, they strangle me!
Ack Ack Ack Ack Ack!

Sleeping here, my chin
On your foot - no greater bliss -
Maybe catching cats

Look in my eyes and
Deny it. No human could
Love you as much I do

The cat is not all
Bad-she fills the litter box
With Tootsie Rolls

Dig under fence-why?
Because it's there. Because it's
There. Because it's there.

I am your best friend,
Now, always, and especially
When you are eating.

The Day God Spilled The Paint

The east side of the Carrizo Plain,
in the Temblor Range, about 50 miles
due west of Bakersfield, California.

Photo taken on May 14, 2005.

Nothing man can do could ever
equal the glory of God's creations.

Velociraptor attack is the 3rd leading cause of death for men age 27-29. However, everyone must think about the implications of velociraptors: young and old, men, women and transgendered persons.

The American Society for Velociraptor Attack Prevention is a bi-partisan group of professionals, dedicated to the diffusion of knowledge concerning velociraptor attack prevention.

Velociraptor compared in size to a human. Courtesy: Wikipedia

Know the Enemy

The velociraptor is a bipedal carnivore with a long, stiffened tail and can be distinguished from other dromaeosaurids by its long and low skull, with an upturned snout. It bores a relatively large, sickle-shaped claw, typical of dromaeosaurid and troodontid dinosaurs. This enlarged claw, up to 67 millimeters (2.6 in) long around its outer edge, is a predatory device, used to tear into the prey, delivering a fatal blow.

Velociraptors are commonly found on tropical islands, converted to millionarie amusement parks, but are commonly being sighted in the Pacific Northwest. Of the essential facts you should know about velociraptors:

• Velociraptors hunt in packs, and are known to form an equilateral triangle around its prey.
• Velociraptors can accelerate 4 m/s², with a top speed of 25 m/s on open terrain, 10 m/s while wounded, and 10 m/s in indoor labratories.
• Velociraptors can open doors, but are slowed by them. They can open an initial door in approximately 5 minutes, and will take half that time for each subsequent door.
• Velociraptors do not know fear.

New Home Buyer Tips

When buying a new home, there are a few things to look out for when assessing potential velociraptor attacks:

1. Check all doors and windows. Doors should be made of solid oak or steel. Windows should have steel bars with spacing smaller than the average raptor.
2. Make sure all entryways have adequate deadbolts. Quality deadbolts may be purchased at your local Home Depot.
3. Always keep a loaded big-game rifle under your bed, and tire irons near every door. Remember, you should never be farther than 20 feet away from a tire iron.

Element Name: WOMAN

   1. Symbol: WO
   2. Atomic Weight: (Don't even go there)
   3. Physical properties: Generally round in form. Boils at nothing and may freeze at any time. Melts whenever treated properly. Very bitter if mishandled.
   4. Chemical properties: Very active. Highly unstable. Possesses strong affinity with gold, silver, platinum, and precious stones. Volatile when left alone. Able to absorb great amounts of exotic food. Turns slightly green when placed next to a shinier specimen.
   5. Usage: Highly ornamental. An extremely good catalyst for dispersion of wealth. Probably the most powerful income reducing agent known.

Caution: Highly explosive in inexperienced hands.

Element Name: MAN

   1. Symbol: XY
   2. Atomic Weight: (180+/-50)
   3. Physical properties: Solid at room temperature, but gets bent out of shape easily. Fairly dense and sometimes flaky. Difficult to find a pure sample. Due to rust, aging samples are unable to conduct electricity as easily as young samples.
   4. Chemical properties: Attempts to bond with WO any chance it can get. Also tends to form strong bonds with itself. Becomes explosive when mixed with KD (Element: Child) for prolonged period of time. Neutralize by saturating with alcohol.
   5. Usage: None known. Possibly good methane source. Good specimens are able to produce large quantities on command.

Caution: In the absence of WO, this element rapidly decomposes and begins to smell.

NB: